You guys, I was ridiculously excited to see that Sonja Foust, the Pintester was hosting another Pintester Movement. I love the Pintester blog so fucking much. I wouldn’t say that she inspired me to start a blog, but I would say she inspired me to say fuck a lot in my blog and also make penis jokes.
Basic premise of the Pintester Movement is to choose a Pin she’s already done, and do your own version of it. Recently she tried the Pioneer Woman’s Pico de Gallo, and it looked so yummy and delicious that I had to try it out. I really wanted it to be a recipe made entirely of garden produce. There were a few snags in this plan though.
1) The yellow squash decided to plow over my green onions in an attempt to take control of the garden.
2) I thought I had a single cilantro plant that I was going to use, but as I was plucking leaves in the dark I quickly discovered it’s actually a basil plant. Which meant at 9:00pm I had to put on real pants (yoga pants are completely acceptable for gardening after dark) and drive down to the grocery store since the corner shop doesn’t exactly sell produce.
3) My jalapeno plant wasn’t exactly up to the task of providing the 3 large peppers that I needed for the recipe. In total, my plant has given me 3 teeny tiny peppers this summer.
4) Oh, and limes don’t fucking grow in Montana.
So. I’ve got garden tomatoes and one tiny jalapeno (bought the rest) to put in the Pico de Gallo, which is better than nothing. Here’s the cast of characters:
I think the pepper in the middle might be a wee bit jealous.
Last time I worked with jalapenos I warned against cutting jalapenos without gloves. Well, I ran out of gloves. No glove, no love, right? I improvised though.
I’m all smart and shit like that.
Always use protection, kids.
The recipe called for the use of 3 jalapenos, seeds, membranes and everything. I’m kind of a pansy when it comes to spice. I really did try to make myself do it, but after chopping one jalapeno, I wussed out and deseeded the other two. Also, technically I only used 2.5 jalapenos since one was a teeny tiny garden pepper.
I began chopping tomatoes, starting with the two larger Green Zebras, 6-7 Yellow Pears, and then a shit-ton of cherry tomatoes. As I was chopping the cherries, I got the brilliant idea to try using my Magic Bullet (which totally just sounds like a sex toy) to try chopping the tomatoes.
Yeah… that doesn’t work that well unless you want tomato slurry. After draining it out, I still needed to chop it up.
So… yeah, don’t do that.
Nonetheless, the tomatoes got chopped up the rest of the way and they were tossed in with the peppers.
Then I got the onions chopped up and tossed them in as well. I should mention, I used green onions instead of white. Why? Because I can’t chop regular onions without wanting to claw my goddamn eyes out. My usual onion chopper (hubs) was at work when I made the recipe, so I improvised with the much milder green onions. Plus, I kind of prefer the flavor of green onions anyways.
Next was the infamous 9:00pm cilantro. I only chopped up half the bunch of cilantro and that was puh-lenty.
With everything chopped up, I mixed it up, added the juice of half a lime and a few shakes of salt, and it was all ready.
Gotta tell you guys, it was pretty fucking tasty. Only keeping the seeds from one jalapeno offered the perfect amount of spiciness for me. I put it on top of some chicken tacos (with roasted yellow squash on the side) and it was a delicious meal.
Om nom nom.